Grounding Together: Supporting You and Your Pet’s Nervous Systems Through Connection
Life with animals is a journey of shared energy and emotion. Just as your pet looks to you for guidance and reassurance, their presence also impacts your own nervous system. This dance of co-regulation—where both you and your pet influence one another's emotional and physical states—is a cornerstone of your bond.
But let's be honest: it can be challenging. Some moments feel like harmony, where both of you are grounded and calm. Other moments feel overwhelming when stress, fear, or sadness take over. And that's okay. You don't need to be perfect, nor does your pet. What matters is showing up with compassion for yourself and for them, knowing that each time you return to your connection you build your pathway to balance.
The Nervous System Dance Between You and Your Animal
Every interaction with your pet involves an exchange of energy. When you're calm and centred, your pet feels it. Similarly, when your animal is relaxed, they return that calm energy to you. On the flip side, your pet can mirror your stress, just as you might reflect theirs.
This is not about blame—it's about awareness. By becoming attuned to your own nervous system and theirs, you open the door to deeper understanding and communication. It's the foundation of animal communication and bodily awareness: noticing the subtle shifts in energy, body movements and emotions of you and your animal, you can respond with more intention of connection.
It's Okay to Have Hard Moments
We all have moments where calm feels out of reach. Maybe you're feeling anxious, or your pet seems unable to settle. Grief or overwhelm is clouding your ability to connect. These moments are part of the ebb and flow of life.
What's important is not striving for perfection but embracing the reality of where you are right now. The act of trying—even imperfectly—creates a ripple of connection. Some days will feel easier than others, and that's okay.
Five Ways to Ground Together
Pause and Breathe Together
Start by noticing your breath. Are you holding it? Is it shallow? Slow it down and let your exhale lengthen. Begin noticing your pets’ breath. Is it fast, slow, or steady? Now begin to breathe with a slow, easy, relaxed breath and focus on finding a mutual rhythm. Pay attention to any shift in your and your pet’s energy.
Use Loving, Intentional Touch
Place your hands gently on your pet with the intention of a slow, steady touch. Move your hand slowly from the back of their head, along their spine, to their tail, then come back to their shoulder and done their front legs to their paws, now come to their hips and go down their back legs, and to their paws. This can help both of you feel present and grounded in your bodies. See how slow you can go with your touch. Try for 1 to 2 minutes per stroke. (note: not all animals will enjoy this - observe and listen and follow their signs)
Notice the Energy Between You
Take a moment to observe your pet without trying to "fix" anything. Are they tense? Hyper-focused? Clingy? Now, self-check in and see if you notice how their energy matches or differs from yours. This simple act of awareness can begin to shift the dynamic. Who is the calmer one? Now, focus on finding mutual calmness by using 1 or 2 above.
Go for a Meandering Walk
Let your pet set the pace. Allow them to sniff, explore, and take in their surroundings without rushing. As they ground themselves in the moment with what they are sniffing, now you can begin to become curious about what they are sniffing, observe their body and how they are moving, how they are breathing, what their energy is, what the surroundings look like, slow down and watch them be in the moment. While watching them, begin to pay attention to your nervous system - are you anxious, settling, annoyed, calming, breathing deeper, shallow, or feeling rushed? There is no wrong response - this is merely an observation, and at this moment, your awareness is what helps you connect to yourself and your pet.
Play or Groom with Intention
Engage in an activity that feels good for both of you. Play a game that brings out laughter, or groom them with the energy of the experience being a spa treatment. These shared experiences nurture connections and help regulate both of your nervous systems.
A Gentle Reminder
It is normal to have moments when calm feels out of reach—times when anxiety, grief, or being overwhelmed cloud our ability to connect with ourselves, our pets, and the present moment. These moments are part of the ebb and flow of life. The point isn’t to strive for constant calm but to cultivate more moments of awareness for both your nervous system and your animal’s. This awareness is the key to truly listening and supporting each other. By simply noticing where you both are, you open the door to connection and create a pathway back to balance for the moment.
Your bond with your animal is a living, breathing connection that is constantly evolving. Remember that being present, even imperfectly, is enough. When you show up with compassion and intention, you create a space where both of you can find grounding and harmony again.
Want to explore more?
If you're navigating a challenging time—whether it's your pet’s illness, aging, or loss—know I’m here to support you. Together, we can explore ways to strengthen your bond and navigate these changes with compassion and understanding. Book a session.
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